In order that I don't jeopardize my future, allow me to just post this picture today as I join others in my profession who are procrastinators and waited until the last minute to renew their license. Of course, I could probably type out a full blog post, have ten notes submitted for billing, and see three clients before I will be able to talk to someone from the Board on the phone.... :)
I know several people (myself included) who need this quote right now. Who are facing a change, and needing help with finding acceptance of a situation and how they will fit themselves into the bigger picture... knowing that ultimately we are not in control, and that we will all be okay when the dust settles.
It's so interesting how we get used to things in our lives. Things like the silverware drawer being the first drawer to the left of the stove, and so when we go to a friend's house and naturally reach for that drawer, we wonder why THEIR silverware isn't in the same place. Or how we get used to people being in our lives. Many times we don't realize that impact that people have on our lives until they tell you that they're going away. You don't realize until you have time for reflection how much you will miss her quick-witted humor. His thoughtfulness in showing appreciation. It's funny that we participate in relationships with others and become so used to characteristics, that we often forget to share with them that which we love about them so.
Something happens, however, when we realize that we need to grow. Realize that we can't keep our feet where they currently are... that they need to explore new places and reach new heights. There can be confusion, sadness, and even anger. (Why isn't your silverware drawer to the left of your stove?! It should be!)
When change is met with love, we realize that we have the capacity to grow. Change isn't meant to be scary, although so many of us think that way. We fear change because we're not sure what is going to happen.
What will come of me?
Will I find a job?
Will this new relationship work?
Will my old friends still talk to me?
What if I made a mistake?
Will there be a drawer to the left of the stove for our silverware? :)
Have courage. Break free from your every day living. Take chances. Embrace that other people may do the same. Accept their decisions, and encourage them to break free from you... even if it hurts. Understand that you aren't in control of anyone but yourself, and that when it comes down to it you can only control how you respond to others' choices.
Grow.
Be fragile.
Break.
Break free.
This Emma Watson chick is awesome. I've read several of her quotes and am awed by her insight in life.
I'd like to go a step further, though, and suggest that sensitivity and strength don't have to be seen as separate characteristics, and can be seen as parallel virtues. That sensitivity doesn't have to be perceived as weakness (though I know it often is) and that being strong doesn't have to mean that a person is void of sensitivity (though I know it often is).
I do, whole-heartedly agree with her that it is about time that we stop viewing people by their gender stereotypes and pigeonholing people into the confines that we, perhaps, have been comfortable with in the past.... that women are supposed to be the nurturers, the caregivers, the stay-at-homers. Men are to be the money-makers, the strong ones, the tough ones.
I say who cares.
All that matters is that we're happy. Tear down the walls. Pull down the tape that keeps you in your bubble. Stretch your lines of comfort. Be who you are, despite what others think. You will be so much more comfortable in the end. I promise.
You'll be dating yourself if you remember being these kids... sitting in the backseat of a station wagon and watching the view of the world from the rear window. Watching things zoom by backward. Watching the past disappear into the horizon.
But truly, I wonder how many people do this in their present lives... watch life from the rear window. I wonder how many people watch watch their past disappear into the horizon instead of looking forward at the present, and experience all that life has to offer in the now.
They get caught up in what could have been, what they should have done, what was great about then, what they miss about what once was. They get so caught up in the past that they miss so much about the present... their relationships, opportunities for laughter, and chances for love.
I encourage you that if you find yourself looking back, to take the time right now to turn around. I know that it's difficult and strange, and somewhat scary. But you cannot do anything about the past. You can only do something about the present. Turn around and be in the now and embrace it. Be here. In 2014. In September. In this fall air. In real time. In your thoughts and feelings. In your confusion. In your hurt. In your joy. In your anger. In your disappointment. In your realness. Face who you are. Overcome your struggles. Look at yourself in the mirror. Don't look back. Look forward.
I'm always up for a party, as my husband will tell you. I love getting together with friends for a cook-out or gathering. But when it comes to an invitation like this, I do my best to RSVP a big 'ole, fat NO.
Getting frustrated is something self-imposed. Anger is a decision that we bring on ourselves, a decision that we make about a situation. We could have made another choice. To think differently, to look for another way out, to have a conversation about our feelings. But instead, we often choose anger as an easy way out... often because it's a comfortable emotion.
Disappointment.
Loneliness.
Jealousy.
Confusion.
Vulnerability.
Those are difficult emotions to express to other people.
Anger is easy.
The next time you're faced with a situation, and you notice frustrations surfacing, take a moment to step back and reconsider your thoughts and feelings. Be willing to sit with them for a bit and consider how you might really be feeling. Instead of jumping to anger, thinking about what might be lingering just under the surface. The real feelings that anger might be masking.
