Becoming.

Sometimes I get clients who are so frustrated about their life situation, that they work really hard at making (and trying to see) immediate changes. Through the process of therapy, however, they become discouraged if symptoms worsen and moods don't improve. I try to warn clients that things might get worse before they get better. Therapy is difficult. Processing thoughts and feelings that you've worked so hard to suppress can bring up situations that you aren't prepared for. And there may be times when you feel like giving up.

I remind them that you can't put the cart before the horse. You have to go through experiences in order to be able to make sense of them and get over them. You have to realize that you can't turn a blind eye to your problems anymore. Addressing issues that have happened over time can be overwhelming, and while you've tried avoiding them in the past, therapy involves facing problems head-on.

If you think that you aren't becoming what you wanted, perhaps there is an opportunity to think differently. Perhaps you are un-becoming the person that you weren't meant to be. Perhaps this un-becoming adventure is preparing you for developing into the person that you were meant to be.

And that can be awfully exciting. Scary at times, but exciting. And you don't have to do it alone. My job as a therapist isn't to fix your problems, but to be supportive along your journey. Your journey to becoming who you really are... even if you have to un-become first.